we rock, we eat, we play dota !

Don't ask me why my title for the post is this, it's just plain randomness.

Jamming Session at Sam's hideout

deviation in progress...

Modern humans are we really modern ? i say we are still the same as our primitive ancestors.
why despite the current advance in technology we still fail at giving a consistency on our emotional aspect such as kinship, friendship and relationship?

it's simple, let me give you some cases to see why.

Case 1:
Monday - I love my family and they mean a lot to me, a simple dining experience outside feels extraordinary and warm.
Tuesday - Bad start , Bad ending of my day. Thanks to my mother etc... spare a thought please !

Conclusion:
One moment you love your family and next you blame them and get pissed off by them because they can't understand your demands.
ok, maybe we can cut some slack here. Sometimes they really do give you problems which spoils your day but must you go about saying how bad they are and etc etc...
What makes me confuse is that you can show the world how much you love your family and next you just put them on top of your annoying list.
where's the love yo ?!

Case 2:
2007 - Hey buddy, you are my best friend and i never want to lose you. Thanks for being there for me through those harsh periods and years.
2009 - Hey buddy, i really do hope to see you soon. But I'm busy with my life right now (as I'm busy waiting for my enlistment, chilling at home with my girl)

Conclusion:
What a strong friendship you got there, you were there for them but where are they when you needed them ?

Case 3:
Monday- i really enjoyed everything over the past few weeks. SWEET !
Tuesday- F*ck ! why do i have to go through all this shit of missing somebody ! I hate love !

Conclusion:
simple, no expectation no disappointment. Just look forward to the next date instead of whining over not seeing someone for a day/week ?

Not trying to be a wet blanket here or a sour grape, it's just make me wonder. Why can't our love for someone/something be consistent ?
Shows how"advance" we are in this 21st century. But are we ?

let's make bombs !

Polarize

It's good to hang out with hq friends after all this while, it seems like nothing had changed much since we orded. Other than Jun Qi that is, haha! But his time is coming soon 1 more working day left for him.
Went to giraffe for dinner, and had garlicky chicken !!! Nothing much had change after I left, the service is still as bad and our food was only served after waiting for an hour and numorious reminder to the server.
Definitely not implying that my service was bad k! In fact I receive quite a number of positive feedback from the customers.
Despite the bad service we still very much enjoyed the ambience there. And no we are not holding another gathering there.

Anyway side track, I have finished my report after a long period of procastination!! The satisfaction ! Amazing.

On my way to school now, dread ! But for the seek of knowledge, it worth while.

P.s. Hk hk hk !!

My EVF

Finally I have decided to turn my blog private. And for those who are invited, welcome to my world.
Let me recap on what have happened so far.
Yes, I'm single now as you can see and yes I was rather emo then. But not anymore, pure serendipity I must say.
And yes, I'm fine and quite enjoying life like this.
It time to drop the fantasy and face the real world. With my new found love scarlett and my iPhone.

I'm on my mission to forget her and move on so that I can better focus on the current tasks and goals I have for myself an very much my parents hopes too. It's been a difficult period of time few months back, new found freedom since i've orded and a ugly breakup.
Also yes the heartaches but I'm glad it all happened, not saying that I've enjoyed it. But at least I saw the true colors of what human are capable of even when you thought you know that person.

Randomness, have watched a few good films recently and found some inspiration from them. Movies like 500 days of summer makes you realise that even thought forgetting someone is difficult but if given enough time you will find back your true passion and motivation. Provided you don't die before that. Haha
another very inspiring movie is julie and julia, it simply motivational and go watch it for yourself : )

exam will be coming in around 1 month time. And after Which I will be flying off to hk for a
getaway : )
hopefully I can earn enough money to fund my expedition.

That all for now, nothing very interesting.

Exposure value

Realizing certain things in life if given a chance to choose a short lived happiness for the sorrowness you get after. I would choose not to have made that decision and know that person. Some might say I'm stuck in the past, but to me I'm
just doing reflection so to better equip myself for future challenges.

It's not totally a waste of time, in fact it's a very valuable lesson to see one true colors. Turn out the person you thought you know, is just an illusion you created for yourself and that reality is merciless.

Nope I don't feel sore, certainly not
just self reflection.

Guitar, camera, xiao bai, and my love-hate family.
Embrace changes
chasing dreams

someday I will create my own clothes brand ! But for now it will only happen in my dreamland of utopia.

Friends can I trust them too ?

21st

when the first light touches my face, and the first breath i take on a Sunday. i realised i have grown 1 year older. it's my birthday today, but i totally have no feeling of celebrating it.

It definitely gonna be a memorable one like many of my first experience, not in a good way but well memorable. My first valentine's time with my gf, we quarreled a day before valentine's and i couldn't even remember what we did that day except for the fact that i think we did went out.
My 1st anniversary in a r/s, started with waiting for morning tuition to end and ended with her going to work, and what did we do ? i hardly remember. but they were definitely oddly memorable.

There's still a long long road for me to walk. i really wish to take good care of my parents and provide them their well deserved retirement despite my mom being a house maker.
and also have a closely bonded family relation, since recently mom and dad isn't on very good terms.

happy birthday Tze hui, remember you have dreams and ambition in your life which you very much want to do and experience. this 21st birthday shall mark the day which you are given a new life, a life of adulthood. Independent and resposible!
It's only going to get better down the road, you deserve to be normal and happy like everyone else :)

Alright i shall take this opportunity to make a wish, i wish that I'll be happy and forget all those unwanted memories not entirely r/s but life in general, be it friends , work or studies.
Life is beautiful and full of surprises, don't just sit there and sulk, walk and turn your head, see the things around you. The earth you are stepping on, be proud and contented that you are able to live a healthy life which not everyone is entitled to.

lastly i really want to thank my parents "thanks daddy for giving me such a BIG cheque" and "mummy for the ang bao which will bring me luck :)"
I LOVE YOU !! that that love is forever ^^ thanks for bringing me into this world although i always complain you being naggy and bossy. haha. you are the BEST PARENTS i could ever wished for :)

I'm going to end this post now, it will not be posted as this will serve as a reminder and my thoughts for my 21st birthday.

constructive

-Severe Censorship is imposed to this entry for the viewing of normal human being-

Something is bothering me but i can't describe it, it's like logic vs instinct.
My instincts tells me that it's safe and harmless through 1 year odd of experience and understanding, but my logic clearly tells me to avoid danger like what my motto suggest "What you don't know, don't hurt you."
Thanks to my very "high" EQ I'm back in the loop of thoughts, which in turn has become an obstacle to my path.

Is it true ? or it is not ?
I'm curious i must say, but curiosity sometimes only bring unwanted result. And by now i would have been the best example of this series of misfortune.

gravitation i despise. we all submit to its mercy and operate under it's demand but those who dream big, came out with airplanes and rockets maybe in the future we might even invent teleportation machines or time traveling machines ?
that's a big if.
But if you were to travel back in time would you choose to change your past ?
For me personally i would choose not to have done several things which had happened so far. But in reality we have to be practical :) that's what I've learn after breathing for twenty nearing 1 year.

等価交換論の構造 ?
maybe ?

back to my dreamland and hopefully dream about something more interesting and less torturing. haha

Moisturize

Soaked with the energy gathered last night, I'm ready to kick start my week maybe for 2 hours ?!
after a weekend of noon naps, i concluded that the more you sleep the sleepier you get. at least this applies to me. Yawns*

came upon this very interesting blog post saying if you were to be given 2 option to a scenario which would you choose

a) knowing that all happiness comes to an end and experience the down side, but still do it.
b) knowing that all happiness comes to an end and avoid so there's no unhappiness.
it's a rough idea so ya.

i personally choose option A, well lets face it we all know everything comes to an end. But why do i still choose it ?reason is simple, you only have ONE life to live why deny yourself the chance to experience something wonderful ?
That's my logic at least, you take up the chance to experience and change not only yourself but maybe other people around you as well, despite knowing that someday it will come to an end. Getting the best of out it rather then missing the chance to do so.
and yes it's worth it ! even knowing the downside, and which choice you make doesn't have with a price ?

I shall state a reason why i didn't choose option B over A, it's simple, if you choose to avoid then you wouldn't learn anything at the end of the day. And what you get is nothing more than being a hermit in your own world of utopia, which at some point of time will be shattered by the cruel reality.

-skipped-

if you are thinking who is Scarlett it's actually the new love i was talking about in my previous post. kinda misleading i know but well she change my perspective of life through a lens :)

I've grown tremendously compared to the past 2 months or 3 ? i no longer feel miserable, no longer desire, no longer dead mentally and physically.

I actually saw her at 15 minutes 2 days back, and thought well since the accidental bump wasn't as bad as i expected as it would be on our first encounter. So i decided to drop her a couple of smses so to catch up, but what comes next wasn't what i expected. Nevertheless, it was unpleasant. But guess like what most people will say "i asked for it." HAHAHA. Alright i better get my ass off the chair to prepare for lesson now.

1/3 from completing my book !

p.s. The movie "Surrogates" was good ! but the ending a little too abrupt.

IV

I'm back in the loop again. crap !!!!!

Scarlett save me !

Bump

Just woke up from this weird dream again, the frequency is increasing.

In my dream, Mom was very repulsive towards the r/s or more exact her while the rest of my family were rather supportive.
she was at my place, but mom tired to chase her out. We retaliate but came to no avail but she ingeniously came up with an idea which managed to even fool me.
and the dream ended up as i woke up from my slumber.

It's just plain annoying to me, hopefully this kind of dream ends with this.

certain people just don't know that they are extremely irritating, guess they never will. Even as a friend I'm too lazy to correct his mistake, because if one self don't realize the truth they will constantly be living in their own world of utopia.

Rise and shine ! :)

Wake me up when September ends

2nd day of October and i have such a dream.
is it good or bad ? but it sure is weird and full of twist.

it's been so long since have such dreams, unpredictable would be best fit the description.

If you haven't know i have left giraffe to take a break from work, and concentrate on living my life to the fullest :) yes i do enjoy working in giraffe but every good thing ends which applies to this as well.

oh ya.! and i bet you guys haven't see my photo on my blog for sometime now, don't really have a decent one but i guess this shot will do ?

Pardon the dirty mirror

twist them, turn them, solve them. like a Rubik's cube it always return to normal.

p.s. I was smoking in my dream, and it feels quite good !